WHY I FAILED IN BUSINESS.

Okay, so technically I didn’t fail…not entirely. Every failure is truly a stepping stone towards success but I had to share this with you because there is so much freedom in this I cannot wait for you to experience it with me. Seriously, I’m smiling here because I know after you read this post you are going to feel amazing, light and at peace with yourself in one big area in your life. 

Failure, defeat, that feeling that you didn’t do it. It wasn’t accomplished…no check mark next to the “these are your life goals” box. You tried to climb the mountain and the mountain kicked your ass on the way down. That’s right, the F word, the big Fail. And guess what? That is beyond normal…in fact it is so normal you can actually get to a place in your life when you can laugh, smile, and NOT beat yourself up about failure. Want to know how I used to feel about failure though? An overwhelming feeling of embarrassment, utter disappointment, a strong desire to never ever try anything again…have you ever felt that way? 

We’ve got a golden opportunity here. Get this…I know why I failed in my other businesses (photography and Network Marketing) or more specifically, why they did not lead to where I wanted them to go. It wasn’t because I wasn’t good at them. It wasn’t because I didn’t have the skills to do the work. I’m super good with people, organized, able to solve problems, technically capable…like seriously, I had the juice to be able to rock those businesses but want to know the missing piece…the one element that if it was present in those businesses would have been the deal breaker?

Alignment. 100%. Even though I did them well and even though I felt passionate about them and could really see myself doing something great with both industries they just didn’t line up with me. This is the thing. There are some people who absolutely are achieve minded focused which in this post means, they set a goal and no matter what (even if they don’t even like the company, their boss, the environment) they smash their goals. They see the prize and go after it. Turns out…I’m not one of those people…lol.

And want to know what’s even funnier? Because I did not have that skill set I would beat myself up and call myself lazy. I would compare myself to those that had entirely different skill sets than I did and instead of tapping into what I was amazing at I decided I was a failure. How crazy is that? I’m actually the opposite of lazy, more like an energizer bunny when I am in alignment. Maybe you’ve had a similar story play through your head at one point or another?

Listen, for me…if I’m going to go all out in something, if I’m really going to put myself out there and be willing to fail, be willing to look silly, be willing to be overly-happy and have people wonder if it’s normal to be like that…I have learned through trying out a variety of different things that I thought I was passionate about, that if it doesn’t speak to my soul, than for me, I just won’t do it. Remember how I said this would be freeing? Here it is…

You might be in a place right now where you know that you want something more. You know that you have a bigger calling in your life than what you are currently doing and you might have even created something really cool, something that you are passionate about but instead of feeling fuelled by that, you are feeling defeated. It just doesn’t feel right and instead of it pouring out of you from a reservoir of inspiration and purpose it feels  a little dry. Have you thought about whether or not you are truly in alignment with it? Key questions.

  1. Do I know what my true message is? And if so, am I creating from that space?
  2. Am I happy with what I am doing? Is there joy and excitement for the next steps or am I hesitating, procrastinating, just not feeling it?
  3. Is this my life’s mission? 

Take some time today and get out a pen and paper and write the answers out. If it’s time to change directions that is awesome. Like a breath of fresh air right? Just because you have always done something doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it. There are no rules around this stuff guys, just decisions. Walking away from something that doesn’t line up with what speaks to your soul, that doesn’t stir up that fire inside of you, that is in not in alignment with your true message is totally okay. It doesn’t mean you failed, it just means you decided to change your course.

There’s a saying out there that goes, “You can only fail if you quit.” And yep, that’s true. But changing course for what brings you to life isn’t quitting. All you’re doing is embarking on a new journey. I’m grateful for my past businesses and I actually still have a hand in them. Residual income is always a smart thing to tap in to. All of it is an incredible learning opportunity. Don’t buy into the hype and stay true to your message. You are all sorts of epicness.

XO believers,

 

 

 

 

Why I Am Committing to Painting My Nails…

Super inspiring right? I’m picturing you jumping out of your skin at the sheer thought of me painting my nails but going all out in the process. Committing 100%. Truthfully though…this is actually a big deal. See, my ability to paint my nails and stick to the process of letting them dry, not smudging them and if they do get smudged not wanting to 1) swear 2) start all over again…and 3) vow to never paint them again is a total work in progress!

This is the truth though right and if you haven’t already picked up on where this is going you are about to be blown away in a few minutes here so stick with me. If you’re a guy, don’t act like you’ve never painted your nails before or had them painted. I know you can relate to what I’m about to say here. So here’s the thing. In my opinion…(no haters) painting my nails has got to be one of the most tedious and disappointing tasks of all time. The thought of going to get my nails painted is like asking me to watch paint dry on the walls but worse because I can’t use my hands! It just doesn’t make sense to me and that is why I am dedicating the next month to literally painting my nails.

You’ve got this much figured out by now…this is not a process I like. In fact, I avoid it at all costs. So why am I taking it up if it’s actually serving me no purpose and bringing this level of angst? Simple…I actually like the way nail polish looks on my hands. It’s shiny, can be moody and in a video your eyes follow it like a bright light so it’s not that I hate it…I’m just not super patient with the process. *dingdingding You’re feeling me right? Not super patient with the process.

Let’s clear some air here and relate this right back to the basics of business. Raise your hand if you have started your own business, partnered with an MLM, started blogging, podcasting, an FB Group anything really that relates back to you wanting to spread your wings and become ultra successful in Biz in the past year? Now be honest, you probably set some pretty awesome goals for what that year was going to look like right? Maybe you nailed it, smashed it out of the park and are now operating the business of your dreams. Or maybe, like most of us humble human beings…you are wondering what the heck went wrong? I should have figured this out by now…I should be making the iconic 6-figures by now…why isn’t this working? What did I miss? It’s been a whole year already!

I feel your pain and if we were having a lovely tea I would probably get out of my seat to give you a hug. I’ve been there. I’ve set those goals, I thought it was going to work out exactly how I meditated and I thought a year was a long time. Kinda like when you paint your nails and you can see how beautiful they look and all you have to do is sit still, try not to do stuff (and I mean anything) while you just wait for them to set and dry. Because we all know what happens when they’re given the time to completely set right? They’re hard as a rock, tough as “nails” and they can take a few more knocks than before. Huh…fascinating analogy right?

So here’s the deal. You know how there are different types of nail polishes. Some set in seconds, others it feels like weeks! They’ve all got a system, a design in them that will respond differently to different environments and obstacles that may come up as they solidify themselves and have that solid foundation to grow on.

Entrepreneurs when they are first starting out…yes I’m going to say it…are like nail polish. We aren’t really sure about what were doing at first. We might not even get the nail polish on the actual nail the first few times and when we do…we try to do a million things in that moment and smudge the heck out of them. Let the base adhere. Let the polish stick. Give it time to become strong and resilient so that when the real blows come like scrubbing the pots and pans you’ve got something to buffer up against. Pretty freakin’ awesome right?

Take a step and trust. – Vishen

That was one step right? Not fifty. I will ask these questions and then leave you to decide whether you will join me in this revolution of nail painting as a way to symbolize the epic entrepreneurial journey (seriously though, we could start a movement here!)

Where in your business right now are you trying to rush the process? (blowing on the nails too hard you’re actually spitting on them?) Where in your life right now would patience be the best approach for the outcome you truly desire? Who do you know that needs to hear this so they can understand they’re not alone? What goals have you set for yourself and do they line up with the growth that is happening on the P.D. side? Are you enjoying the journey or are you swearing at it? (we’ve all been there…I still go there from time to time). You are human, you’re an epic human being for sure and truly destined for something earth shattering but embrace your humanness. Have fun with all of this, stay consistent, create a vision for your life and be joyful and grateful for where you are right now.

XO dreamers,

 

 

 

 

P.S. I have to know…what did you think of the nail polish analogy?!! Haha…reach out to my anytime. I love connecting with vibrant souls ready to embark on something great. 

ARE YOU DAZED AND CONFUSED?

Have you ever felt confused? I would imagine everyone reading this at some point or another has felt this state of being. We are faced with numerous amounts of decisions throughout the day. Should I have that last piece of cake for breakfast or should I blend up some carrots and kale? Should I take that new position at work or should I start up my own business? Should I finish college or university or should I backpack across Europe? Should I have children or not? Little to big, we face decisions every single day.

So naturally, a state of confusion would be inevitable at some point. Do you believe that when you are confused that it is a negative thing? See, I think many of us do. We are taught to believe that we must have the answers to our questions immediately and if we don’t…something must be wrong. That’s not entirely true, nor is it entirely false. Being in a state of confusion can be a blessing in disguise. 

Let me explain. I think it’s safe to say, that deciding whether or not to have cake for breakfast or a veggie smoothie is a pretty simple decision right? If so, then why do some people place so much of their value and worth on such a simple decision? For example, let’s say Megan opens up the fridge door, she sees the triple chocolate cake…there’s only one piece left but it looks so good. She’s been “trying” to eat healthy and has committed to losing those 5 lbs because she really wants to lose the weight but that cake is just sitting there…talking to her. She knows how delicious it will taste compared to the veggie smoothie she “should” be having and before you know it 5, 10 minutes have gone by and she hasn’t been able to make a decision about what to have for breakfast!

In fact, in that period of time she has told herself things like, “If you eat that cake you know you’re going to regret it. If you eat that cake you’re just going to feel guilty about it later. If you eat that cake your entire day will be ruined. If you eat that cake it means you’re not committed to losing that weight you know. You never follow through on anything do you? Why can’t you just stick with the plan? What’s wrong with you?” Whoa…and I thought we were just talking about cake here. It’s never just about the cake. It’s always about the layers and stories around the cake. How did eating something you truly enjoy become all about how much value you place on yourself?

Megan is obviously confused here right? It doesn’t take 5-10 minutes to decide whether or not you want a veggie smoothie or not. But it does take time to know why the decision is so hard to make. You can apply this to any situation. Right from the small decisions to those really big life altering decisions. What is the story behind the situation? 

We have a responsibility when we are in a state of confusion and I’m going to share that with you now:

  1. It’s time to start digging for those answers. If you are confused about something in your life right now and you truly desire to be able to come to a clear decision it your responsibility to start asking questions. In Megan’s case I would ask her: How committed are you truly to losing those 5 lbs? Why is it so important to lose them? Will you feel better about yourself if you do? Or is that an external validation for an inner feeling of loss of self-worth? If you don’t lose the 5 lbs what does that mean? Have you failed if you choose the cake? If yes, then does failure give the excuse to give up? Is there another time in your life where giving up became a pattern for you? Are you afraid of your own success? 
  2. Be willing to do the work. Confusion is an opportunity to reevaluate what is and what is not working. Saying “I don’t know” is more like saying, I want to avoid the situation. I don’t want to talk about it because it means I have to face what I don’t want to face. If I say I don’t know it means I don’t have to hurt anyone and I would do anything to not hurt anyone including lie to avoid the truth. We always know. Stop being afraid of the elephant in the room.
  3. Be kind and patient with yourself. If you are in a really tough situation right now where a lot is resting on making some decisions about why you are confused this is not the time to start responding out of guilt, this is not the time to start beating yourself up. Truly, you will repeat behaviour that is disempowering and not in alignment with seeking clarity if you start operating from a place of guilt. The emotions you are feeling are not there to overwhelm you, they are there to guide you. Stop judging yourself and place no expectation on things having to be right or wrong. Be fully present and conscious so you can take everything into account, seek guidance from credible and reliable sources and take 5-10 deep breaths when you feel overwhelm come over you. Change your state so you can change the outcome. 

 

It may sound bizarre but embrace the confusion. We were not designed to have all the answers to all of our questions all the time. We are not google! If we were we wouldn’t need one another. Relationships would be pointless. Friendships would not serve a purpose. Our offspring would only use us for purely survival purposes. It would totally suck. The wrong part of confusion would be to stay in that state and not do the work to find the clarity and discover your truth. Honestly, being confused isn’t a bad thing, choosing to stay there because it’s safe and comfortable is not cool. It does not serve your higher purpose and will affect your ability to grow, learn and adapt. So embrace confusion so you can truly release it and just know, it will more than likely happen to you again. When it does though wouldn’t it be nice to get excited about that? I mean, it’s an opportunity for a breakthrough! I friggin’ love that!  

It would mean the world to me if you received a new insight, something of value from this blog today that you would let me know. Leave a comment below, send me an email. Anything you like, I love hearing from you. And as always, I am so grateful when you share my posts on social media. 

You are all sorts of amazing,

XO,

 

THE INTRINSIC POWER OF RELEASING YOUR VOICE

In a world filled with noise, wouldn’t it be nice if we all knew the sound of our own whisper?

I like to think of it like the wind. Our voice speaks sweetly at times and caresses our senses so that we may look up and rise. And at other times, our voice echoes and booms in our ears to wake us up immediately. A warning to take heed and come alive.

I found my voice at a young age. I found it through the gift of singing and writing poetry. My heart ached and spilled in so many different directions, I would be called “over emotional” at times and I am sure in my youth, I was exasperating when I would start feeling too much and start speaking passionately about the tragedies of the world and the ridiculous rules that would try to chain me in.

I remember feeling so much.

I have notebooks filled with poems, a glass jar full of the written word on pieces of paper and you could always tell when something was burning in my heart because I would sing. My voice was powerful, untrained but I had no idea there was something more for me to explore there.

I wish I could say I never gave in to the demands of conforming but that is not true in this case. With a longing to fit in so badly, the older I got the more this spark in me started to subside. I wanted to be a part of something so badly not realizing at the time that it was my ability to be bold and fearless, to have courage, to speak out, to be different was what was really needed for me to feel that connection.

Nurture the unique beauty that resides within you. The need to conform is a false sense of security for you. As I learned, passion locked in will find it’s way out and in the process it will unravel so many things I had tried to bury but could not. Unspoken dreams, regret, past pain, and a deep, deep sense of loss.

The process of finding my voice:

I would like to say it didn’t take long but it was years in the making. I pushed it down so deep within my soul and covered it up with religion, marriage, children, and realistic, mediocre dreams that I no longer even recognized myself anymore.

The disdain I felt for myself was overwhelming. I could see nothing good about my life. It all felt like a lie and a nasty trick someone was playing on me. My voice had become so muddled inside of me, begging to be let out but in my anger, ingratitude and loss of who I truly was, I had nothing to give and in the absence of service I felt useless.

This, my beautiful soul, is why we must connect deeply with our voice. Imagine what would happen to our world if we did this? Imagine what would happen if we could hear the calling of our soul in a gentle whisper. The truth has always been. It is there, waiting for you to partake in it. You have always been there, waiting to be acknowledged, felt, empowered, given permission to rise. It comes from you.

So what did I do?

I unravelled…completely. I cut myself off from all external sources, people, religions, societal rules and I dove deeper into what felt like a void at the time but it was in this darkness that I found my light.

I stopped letting outside sources speak for me and started listening to the questions that were burning in my soul. Who am I? Why am I here? What is my purpose? Why do I exist? What do I want? I started listening and reading, listening and reading.

It started with Brené (bless her and her work) and I read every book she wrote. Then Dyer, Tolle, Robbins, John Maxwell, and currently Vishen. Podcasts and TedTalks were my source of entertainment and like a person who had been walking through a desert for years I quenched my thirst for knowledge, inspiration, insight, worth, and recreated my entire mindset.

I forgave myself and I forgave others. I stopped blaming the world for not being there for me and decided to be there for the world and in this rebirth of love for humanity and the kindness and love that I see in this world I found my voice. I found it…but here is the truth of what I mean. My voice had never actually left me. I only had buried it in my attempt to fit in.

Please, stop going out side of yourself to find yourself. You are not out there. You are here, right now and your light is inside. Your joy is in your being, your peace, your love, your worth. It is not in someone else, it is not in any one thing, it is not my friends even in gems, spiritual stones, religions, books, commands…now these can all help. Yes, there is a reason why they are here because they pose the question of, “is there something more?”

You will not find your voice in these things however. Each of them brings a level of noise. Your voice is entirely your own. Like a finger print, it is your way of finding yourself where you have always been.

When I finally came to this place of love for myself and love for others I let my journey and process pour out of me. I started blogging, slowly at first and then weekly as I found I had more to share. I began to recognize I could actually do something for this world and started speaking and recording myself and sharing that on Facebook, Instagram and realized, I was not alone in this awakening.

The ripples keep going even now as I have collaborated with 22 entrepreneurial experts and provided a free online summit for 1,000’s of people who are searching, who are questioning, who are where I was and need to know it is necessary to step out and rise up. I am humbled by all of this, and must quiet the voice in my head that says, “it’s still not enough.” Regardless of titles, my message is helping others and I have decided to coach people so they too can live in this freedom and purpose.

Do what you must to figure this out. I will offer only one piece of advice and know this comes from a place of love. Don’t sit on your greatness. Regardless of whether you believe you have something to offer the world, you do. That is simple truth. Let your voice rise up inside of you and practice speaking it out loud, writing it down, singing it out. It will pour out of you once you acknowledge that it’s there. Give it a go…pen in hand, breath in lungs…who is living inside of you? I’m curious to find out. Aren’t you?

WHERE YOU ARE IS TEMPORARY

All right lovely, ready for some radical freedom? Nodding your head…smiling? Awesome, we are off to a great start. Where you are right now is temporary. That’s right, it doesn’t last. It’s going to have a beginning and an end and no matter how hard you try to hold on and control how it all turns out it’s light years ahead of you.

Life is going to happen and life is going to end. Our response and how we show up in this world is our ultimate freedom on this earth.

Really think about it. All around you, every single day a thousand breaths enter this world while a thousand breaths leave regardless of what you are doing in those moments. While we are mindlessly spinning through our days giving so much energy to things, that when you look at the big picture of what is actually happening around us are really quite insignificant right?

Why do we get so caught up in the stress? Why is it so hard to let go? Why do we let petty things get in the way of our own joy? We can act a lot like pin balls, letting life bounce us around, beat us up a bit, we get caught in the drama that is happening around us instead of realizing we don’t have to play that game. We don’t have to keep getting knocked into a game that isn’t working for us anymore.

My hearts desire is to wake people up. Shake things up, agitate the heck out of you even if you don’t agree with what I am saying, at least you will know where I stand. Have you ever been so caught up in a situation that it consumed your every waking hour? Have you ever wanted to hurt someone because they hurt you? Have you ever loved talking salaciously about another person because it made you feel better about yourself? Have you ever felt that sense of joy at another person’s downfall?

We do this…especially when we are unhappy and lonely. Especially when we let things like anxiety get the best of us. Believe me, I feel all of these things too. I can be the best version of myself or the worst…I decide how I show up. We all do.

How do we stop letting life get the better of us? How do we rise above a projected standard as to how this is all going to turn out? How do we live life and stop caring about what others think?

That’s truly it isn’t it…we care so much about what other people think we deny our own joy. I refuse to live like that. And there’s the freedom right there. Refuse to participate in the bullshit. You know how to do this. You were born with this skill. When you were two and you did not want to go to bed…you didn’t. You know how to refuse a situation that just doesn’t suit who you are becoming.

Think BIG picture. Who do I need to be to become to be who I want to be? To earn what I want to earn. To be loved the way I want to be loved. To travel the way I want to travel. To give the way I want to give. Start embodying the person that is light years ahead of where you are right now.

Imagine what it would feel like to burst your own bubble as to what reality is. We are built up to believe a series of lies. There isn’t a golden ticket that only gets handed to some, the opportunity to live life on your own terms is available to all of us. How willing are you to let go of the fear? Think BIG picture. I’m saying it again because it’s truth. 

Coaching has been such an integral part of getting in touch with my voice and if you are reading this now saying, “I want to think BIG picture. I want to know who I am. I want to stop living in fear.” Give yourself the gift of finally doing something just for you and start. Take action. You know where my heart is and that is to see people rise up in their greatness and beauty and become the leader I know they can be. I can help make sure your voice does not suffocate inside of itself. Stop denying your freedom.

If this is triggering something for you that’s a good thing. You deserve to know. I’m inviting you to connect, the link to book a Free Discovery Call is right on this page.  

You are worth it.

XO Dreamers

ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?

Things are a-changing…and not just metaphorically. Next blog post you see will be coming from the same URL…but totally different site. (Tricked ya’! Happened today so I’m just going with it).  Don’t be confused, it’s still me typing away thinking about all the amazing things you will do.

Amidst all of the changes, new site, loads of new content, FB Group where I go live daily and pour inspirational and practical tools for those in the group, summit launching (you know about the summit right? It just started, Success in Your 20’s find out more info here, just just for your 20’s), there has been a lot of love and thank you’s pouring in from all over the place and I’m truly blown away.

You know when you start something and your original idea is great for WHY you are doing it but when it actually starts happening the results can feel a little scary right? The time in planning everything is over and it’s just happening and you’re watching it and realizing that you actually started something amazing, saw it through, talked to people you never would have dreamed about talking to before and then started creating stuff from your own head space and if you could see my face right now I think the feeling would translate better…lol…slightly dazed and confused mixed with, “did I really just do that?”

So, I don’t say this to say, “ooh, look at me! Look at me!!” I say this because I’m quite overwhelmed by all the love…in fact…when I receive an email with someone saying thank you to me, or saying I’m beautiful, or that they’re honouring me in some way I quite honestly can’t respond right away. 

In fact, what I actually do is read it, my hand goes to my mouth, more often than not I tear up a little and I think…”wow, I have to be ready to receive this part too.” Do you ever feel that way? Like you’re not ready to receive the thank you’s but more than willing to spread them around like butter? (Almond butter, I don’t eat butter technically). 

As one of my favourite people in the world says, “I’m as Human AF.” – Peta Kelly

Meaning, I’m checking myself and making sure I am ready for the emotional part of success. The part that doesn’t get talked about that much because even though I talk a heck of a lot about self-worth I struggle with it still too. I’m human, thank God. My friend Angie Lee and I were talking about that post interview…how so often we will reach a level of success that we are in fact striving for, but are so focused on the practical side that when it happens there’s this emotional imbalance and the skeletons in our closet can start coming out. Taunting us in a way, trying to diminish the good that is happening.

If you are in a situation right now where amazing is happening and your vision is taking root, maybe even some sprouts are out and you are truly excited but are feeling a little off…that’s normal. Use those times as a way to check in with yourself. Why am I feeling this way? Why is this hard for me to receive? Remind yourself that you are enough, you are worthy of this and you would do for others what they are doing for you.

I would also say to start your next planning phase. Now is not the time to sit back and let it all unfold. Your energy and focus are needed now more than ever. When we start to recognize the absolute unlimited expanse of what can happen when we actually start dedicating real time to the process of following that sweet nudge guiding us in the direction of what our hearts truly want, it is so important to keep that consistency going and to start thinking about how you can add more value, where you can leverage and repurpose your work and who else you need to be working with to continue to move your business forward.

People come into our lives to teach us. Never be afraid of a big investment on yourself.
There is all sorts of incredible stored up inside of you. Let it shine. We need more people lit up and ready to love life in all it’s imperfect ways. In all the ways that matter and leave a smile on your face.

So blessed by you, thank you for all the love.

You are amazing, you are worth it.

xo believers,

A LETTER TO MY PARENTS

**This article was originally published on The Huffington Post. Click here to view it there.

I wasn’t a hard kid to raise, I never really broke any major rules or ever really got into trouble for that matter. I do not have a traumatic child hood experience, (except for maybe my older brother’s incredible ability to be exactly that, the “older” brother who bless his heart was trying to prepare me for the world, love ya’ Ray). My childhood was amazing, I was well taken care of, loved and still to this day my Mom and Dad are there for me 100%.

I can only imagine what it must feel like to have a daughter though that is so open, so out there, so willing to share exactly what is on her mind and heart and does it so publicly. It must be hard to hear and at times, I’ve worried them so much with what I do share that I fear they think they’ve done something wrong.

 As a parent now, I know how hard it is to raise children. Had I not started my own journey in personal development, self-love and conscious living I  shudder at the idea of the kind of parent I would be! Our children have a way of bringing out our most amazing qualities and our absolute worst. I say that because as I continue to unlock the truths for my life that I have discovered in this process I don’t want anymore apologies from them. I don’t want them to think they have done anything wrong because they haven’t. They are amazing and did their absolute best (which was pretty fantastic)! It wouldn’t have mattered if they were “perfect” (and I use that word loosely) I would still be me.

 So this is the thing. If you are a parent right now and you are trying desperately to be everything for your child I am asking you to stop. I have two beautiful children of my own and I get that feeling of wanting to fill all the voids, be the person who is there for them always, every event good or bad, to have their life be filled with just you. I get it. I understand it so I say this with love and the deepest of respects but they are their own person.

 Do we shape and mould? Absolutely. Do we have a significant  impact? Yes, 100%.Are we entirely responsible for how their lives turn out? No. They are who they are even without us. 

 Parents this isn’t about you. Mom, Dad, this is my journey and as grateful as I am for all the lessons, the good and the bad, this is my story. And my story, is not unique in the sense that I am the only person in the world who has ever felt lost, lonely, sad, angry, broken…I share that with many people and that, has little to do with how you raised me. It has everything to do with what I am learning about myself. I also felt immense joy, love, happiness, well taken care of, special, safe…all the good stuff too.

 We raise our children to be independent and free and when they actually start exercising those muscles and experience all of the world’s feelings, we try to pull them back in to where it is safe, where we can control what they are feeling. Parents, it doesn’t work that way. And because it doesn’t work that way when we as children, start releasing our hurts and being open about who we are we are not saying, “You did this to me.” That is not your responsibility anymore, it is ours because in the true process of recognizing freedom with that comes the choice to either hold on to the hurts or to see them as gifts.

 I choose to see all of my life lessons, those impacted by others and those that I have done to myself as gifts that I can now pass on to wake people up. So to my parents, Mom and Dad, you didn’t do anything wrong. I love who I am, I love how you raised me and I am responsible for how all of this turns out. I am happy, I am alive, and I have memories that I will cherish always because of you. I would change nothing. I am free and I am loved.

XO,